Dawn of the Dude

by Cross Examination

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credits

released July 4, 2014

Daniel: Vocals
Leon: Guitar
Justin: Guitar
Jimmy: Bass
Ryan: Drums

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Cross Examination St Louis, Missouri

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Track Name: Opposite Day
Another beer for me? No thanks; already had one
I gotta work early, plus I don't like to have fun
Last Monday I was first one in and last to leave
No drinkin' on the weekend; love to work; need no reprieve
What the fuck?

Opposite Day
Is a fun game to play
Opposite Day
Saying things you'd never say
Opposite Day
Is it for real? No way!
It's Opposite day! Opposite day!

I'm real concerned about my 401k
Check the Dow like every hour and I shower every day
Politics? Now we're talking! How 'bout a debate?
But let's not stay too long 'cause church is starting; we'll be late -- oh no!

Opposite Day
Is a fun game to play
Opposite Day
Saying things you'd never say
Opposite Day
Is it for real? No way!
It's Opposite Day! Opposite Day!

Opposite Day
The scary thing is, some would say
Opposite Day
Their days are like this normally
What the fuck?
Track Name: Ritual Snackrifice
Awake, my eyes open, my ass on the couch
Beer spilled, shoes on; I guess I must have passed out
The clock's hands' positions say a quarter to three
Don't need nutrition, still the kitchen is summoning me

An unholy hunger I just can't shake
Demon-possessed with an obsession for caloric intake
It's like no matter what I ate the day before
Come 3 a.m. it's time for more

Pizza rolls, taquitos
Diarrhea tomorrow
Cheesy fries and Beast Ice
Pulverizing my insides

Forty bagel bites!
Track Name: Hail to the Jeef
Too fast to live, too dumb to die
Weapon of mass destruction fueled by bum wine
Combining alcohol with pure stupidity
A chuggernaut we call "Commander in Jeef"

Born to thrash
Chugs abandoned beers already filled with ash
While pissing in the wind

His naked ass
Exposed for all the world to see; he's fucking trashed
Let the party begin

It's headfirst off a trampoline
Out in public, make a scene
Roll around in broken glass
Kick some ass

One case down, crack another
Jokes about fucking your mother
Brain begins shutting down
Gonna level this fucking town

Hail to the jeef
3053
Hail to the jeef
3053

Waking up in your own urine
Last night but a hazy dream
Washing open wounds with bourbon
Squeaky clean

Wake and bake to help the headache
Infest to wake up your friends
Even though it's barely daybreak
Do it all again

'Cause fuck you!
Track Name: Subterranean Thrash Assault
You booked us a show and said everything was a go
But now the venue flaked; you're totally screwed
Two days from the date set you're clearing a spot in your basement
The show must go on, man; what else could you do?

Your laundry room once held all your hangers
But now it's filled with punks and headbangers
And your roommate's getting pissed off defending his stuff
From all the kids here rowdy and full of beer

Tonight's the night for subterranean thrash assault
If your neighbors call the cops it's not our fault
You shouldn't move next door to people that suck ass
We just came to have some fun and play some thrash, have a blast
Before we leave we'll siphon their cars of all the gas

We're doing dives off the washing machine
And I saw some drunk with his head in the dryer
So I doubt your clothes are still clean

Yeah basement shows are the best around
And the underground scene's always better
When its under the ground

Your lawn will get fucking tortured
By drunken thrashers puking off your porch
And on your floor beer will get fucking spilled
So don't forget to get the keg refilled
Track Name: The Bluntacolypse
It came from on high
Its smoke filled the sky
Citizens were fried
Bluntacolypse nigh

50 stories tall
Smashing though the walls
As buildings did fall
They sent out the call

SOS!
The military, army, air force and marines
They all came through in full attack but could do nothing at the scene
This monstrous creature smashing, smoking, stomping through the streets
Had this effect that made them want to play video games and eat

It was a blunt
400 foot blunt
And their united front
Could do nothing at all; the enemy was too powerful
The smoke
Filled the air and made them choke
'Til their resolve was broke
Like laughing gas it swiftly knocked them on their ass

Get me the Awesome Party Squad
The mayor shouted into the red phone's receiver
Get me the Awesome Party Squad
They are the ones that we need to be here
Get me the Awesome Party Squad
This is essential to our very survival
Get me the Awesome Party Squad go!

At A.P.S. HQ the crew was being fly
When shining bright outside our window came the signal in the sky
We finished off our beers and ran out quickly to the van
Ready to aid and serve the public like only our squadron can

We saw a blunt
400 foot blunt
Standing right out front
Of city hall; the police could do nothing at all
Surprised
Could not believe our eyes
Impressed by its size
Hurried and scanned the scene as we devised a plan

We split into four groups; divide and conquer with our troops
Knowing that if we did we'd get it surrounded
Scaling up the building was key, we knew, and just the thing
Get up to its level and send it back to hell

Repelling down from on our ropes from up high was our only hope
To get into a position from which we could attack and win
We climbed up on the monster's back and swiftly began our attack
Were well into the fight and then it happened: a moment of Zen!
Track Name: The Dawn of the Dude
As I stand here before you I think i should warn you
I haven't been feeling quite myself these days
Afloat in an ocean too potent this potion
Has got my mind twisting itself in a maze

And it's starting to be
Difficult for me
To distinguish delusion from reality
This was a mistake for my sanity's sake
As it takes it and fakes it it shakes and it breaks it

I'm no fucking coward; I'll show you my powers
And then you will see why they're all scared of me
Prepared for the end; dressed in black toe to chin
But lately my friends say I've been acting crazy

So I reach in my skull
Pull out my brain
Destroy it before it can drive me insane
Took one sip to trip from this magic elixir
And now it won't quit; holy shit someone fix it!

Fuck!!!!